Living In The Light

First, hello again. I know it's been a while since I've blogged. Secondly, prepare yourself. We are about to talk about some REAL issues, heart issues. You know the ones, those secrets which we hold so closely to ourselves, afraid that if someone even glimpses them, they'll never look at us the same way again. Well, I am here, and I am real. I am struggling. This particular blog is about my transparency, with you, friend. It would be a lie to say that I've been walking in transparency with anyone. There has been sin in my life which has stayed hidden away, one of those secrets that I keep to myself because I'm afraid, that if anyone even catches a glimpse of it, they might see me differently. I am, as I strongly suspect that you already know, quite imperfect. I'm untrusting, self-serving, self-gratifying, unfaithful, and fully undeserving. I admit that it's rather unnerving writing this down in a blog, but I want to live in the light, no longer separated from the Living Water that I've been turning away from, but fully embracing the spring of life that Jesus brings to me.

First, in case you're unaware, please believe me when I say that Jesus Christ is the living water. In other words, He brings life into our soul, meaning into our lives, and purpose. Without Him we are left to chase our own debacles, our failures, ultimately wondering what we were chasing after for fulfillment in the first place. I was chasing after love. When I think back on my experiences, the first place that I am brought to in Scripture is Jesus' encounter with the Samaritan Woman at the well. Jesus was incredibly faux pas. First, he was a man, talking to a woman, alone, asking for a drink of water. This was SCANDALOUS, absolutely SCANDALOUS. But, not only that, she was a Samaritan, known as a half-breed to the Jewish community, and hated by them consequently. And finally, if that weren't enough, she was an adulterer, kicked out of the community (which is why she wasn't at the well in the morning with the other ladies of the town) having not 1 or 2 relationships, but 6 in total. Six relationships! She was looking for love, but I think it was a bit obvious that she hadn't found it. But this was her day! She didn't know it, but THIS was the day when her life would change, this was the day that she would never be thirsty again. Here's how her story goes:

John Chapter 4:

"The Pharisees heard that Jesus was gaining and baptizing more disciples than John, although in fact, it was not Jesus who baptized, but his disciples. When the Lord heard of this, he left judea and went back once more to galilee. Now, he had to go through Samaria. So he came to a town in Samaria called Sychar, near the plot of ground Jacob had given his son Joseph. Jacob's well was there, and Jesus, tired as he was from the journey, sat down by the well. It was about the sixth hour.

When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, 'Will you give me a drink?' (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food) The Samaritan woman said to him, 'You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?' (For Jews did not associate with Samaritans) Jesus answered her, 'If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.'

'Sir,' the woman said, 'you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his flocks and herds?'

Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."

The woman said, 'Sir, give me this water so that I won't get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.'

(Here comes the important part of the story for us to note)

He told her, 'Go call your husband and come back.'

'I have no husband,' she replied.

Jesus said to her, 'You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.'

....................... [continuing at verse 28)

Then, leaving her water jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, 'Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?' They came out of the town and made their way toward him."

Jesus' interaction with this woman is complicated, but what we must draw from this is simple. First, God knows EVERYTHING. Jesus had never met this Samaritan woman before, yet he knew every detail of her life, intimately. Likewise, He knows every detail of our lives intimately, whether we choose to share it with him or not. He knows those secrets which we think we hide so well, that we think are hidden away in dark places. They are not hidden from his sight.

Secondly, He offers us a living water. What exactly is living water? What does this mean? This is how it simplifies. This Samaritan Woman had chased after love for her entire life, so much so that she had already had 5 husbands, and was now in an adulterous relationship with a sixth man, a sixth. So many men, so little love, so little satisfaction. She thirsted after men, because that is where she thought she'd find satisfaction and fulfillment. She was wrong.

We are an empty, thirsty people, running after things which will never fulfill us. Even the richest man longs for something more than money, the philanderer longs for more fulfillment than sex could ever give him. We long for something more.

Jesus offers us that. What He offers us will quench our desire, quench the seemingly never-ending thirst we feel for more in this life. He offers us living water, an everlasting love, riches beyond compare, fulfillment like we have never dreamed. But to inherit this, we must live in the light. We must be cleansed by the living water, shedding those dark places, becoming transparent to the living God, becoming transparent to his church. At first, it's terrifying. What will they think of me? I am too ashamed. How will I ever find the courage? How could I ever be so open, so revealing in front of others? Courage comes from the the daily renewal. Drinking from the well of living water every single day gives us the courage to cast off those masks which have hidden our true identities. It gives us courage to say that we are not ashamed of our mistakes, because grace covers over our sins. In the eyes of God that shame is washed away, and we are clean, like lambs before him, spotless. He loves us with the love of a true Father, a Creator who longs to be in relationship with his sons and daughters no matter the mistakes.

In Christ, there is freedom. In walking in the light, there is freedom. I pray that we no longer live in the dark, scared and ashamed, but that we would drink daily of the living water, and find ourselves living in the light, with all our sins washed away, pure in His sight. Amen.

Proverbs 27:5 "Better is open rebuke than hidden love."

"Better is open rebuke than hidden love." Rebuke is definitely an issue that we, the church struggle greatly in. We have become weak and are unable to rebuke those who sin openly in our midst. 2 Timothy 3: 16-17 states that, "All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." Keeping these two scriptures in mind, today's church at-large has failed, myself included.

As Americans we are taught to be self-focused, to have a faith that is not based on the community of the church, but based solely on individuality. This is wrong. The community of the church which we are all blessed with is there to keep us focused, provide support, and provide rebuke in love. I think that when Christians generally think of the word/action of rebuke/rebuking, it's usually with a negative connotation. This does not have to be the case, and I will share with you why I believe that.

We all know the verses in 1 Corinthians 13 which describes the characteristics of love. Some of the characteristics include patience, kindness, being humble, not being rude, not boasting. We are able to rebuke with humbleness, with patience, being humble, not being rude, and not boasting in our own pride. Through the Holy Spirit we are able to truly love, if we let Him work through us. This doesn't mean that we give free passes to those Christians who sin. This means that our love should extend so far as to make sure that we keep one another accountable, that we walk soundly in our faith. In fact, Titus 1:13 tells us this: "This testimony is true. Therefore, rebuke them sharply that they may be sound in their faith." Luke equally says, "If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him." (17:3).

Rebuking someone does not mean that we forever get to hold sin over one another (as I so often forget). Rebuking someone comes from a love rooted so deeply in the Lord that we wholly desire to help one another lead a holy (set apart) life. I for one confess my sin in this area. I am so good at holding other people's sin over their head even after I have supposedly forgiven them. I pray that the Lord forgives me for this, and that they bear with me in love. I know that the Lord has often rebuked me, taught me, disciplined me, for things which I knew were wrong. Revelation 3:19-22 reads, "As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten. Therefore be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. To him who overcomes I will grant to sit with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. 'He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.' " The lord does not discipline us out of anger, He disciplines us out of love! He disciplines us out of a genuine desire to be with us in the end, after everything is said and done, He wants to sit with us on the throne! God didn't send his only Son Jesus Christ to die on a cross in order that we might continue to live in bondage! No. Absolutely not. He died in order that we might overcome, in order that we might be reconciled with God through the death of his son.

Now is the time for the church to rise up! Now is the time for the church to live in boldness with one another. In order for others to see the Christ in us, we must walk through the refining fire, we must rebuke one another in love, we must have a genuine desire to help one another live holy lives. This is our charge. I'll end much like I began, with a verse from 2 Timothy 4, "I charge you therefore before God and the Lord Jesus Christ, who will judge the living and the dead at His appearing and His kingdom: Preach the WORD! Be ready in season and out of season. convince, rebuke, exhort, with all longsuffering and teaching. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables. But you be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry." Amen.

A Sacrifice...."Father, not my will, but yours be done"

What is it to realize the sacrifice that was made for you and me on the cross? Jesus, fully human, and fully divine, felt all of the same feelings that we feel, everyday. He smiled, he laughed, he cried, he was crushed, physically and emotionally. His friends, in the garden could not even stay awake one hour while Jesus went and prayed. The son asked the Father, 

Luke 22:42, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done."  

Do we realize what the means to say, not MY will, but YOURS be done. God called us out of death by paying the price for our souls on the cross with his son. Imagine the agony, the torture, of Jesus on the cross, the blood. I cannot fathom the anguish that Jesus felt on the cross, yet His anguish brings me joy! It brings me joy to know that I am saved by the blood of the Lamb, the one who fulfilled centuries of prophecy, who was nailed to a tree, for my very life. I tremble to think, I wonder how I take for granted this blood shed for me everyday, and pray for mercy to the God who cared enough to save me from an eternity of sin and hell. 

I am justified through the Cross, by grace, through faith, and He beckons me from the Cross to my knees, so that I may be at a loss for words, and humbled in surrender to His will. I am continually amazed as the multitude of Jesus' sacrifice for me is revealed. I am sweetly broken for the man who saved my life, my first love. The truth is, I want you to know this as well. I want you to rejoice in your salvation through Jesus Christ, and repent of the sinfulness which we all take part in. We are empowered by the Spirit and we have victory in ALL things. Victory through Jesus Christ. And in this knowledge, I am invited to rejoice, in ALL things. I rejoice in my salvation through Jesus Christ and his death on the cross, for me, and for YOU. My prayer is that we would ALL know Him, for he is merciful, righteous, he loves justice, and and He is faithful, unyielding, and above all, loving. I see the work of the Lord in my life, in the woman I've become, how he's blessed me with community, and 2 churches who love me and support me. Come to Christ, investigate Him, find Him. His love is unfailing, He created you, He wants to know you, intimately. Come to your Creator. Fall in love once again. Know that I love you, and that this is my prayer for your life. 

"The World Rewards Sin"

     Recently, I was privileged to be a member of staff for the VA YMCA's Model General Assembly. The basic gist of the program is that the kids get to come to Virginia's capitol for 3 days and do everything that the actual Virginia Assembly does. Beforehand, the high school kids are supposed to patron different bills to support their ideas and positions. As staff, my particular job was to track the student's bills from house to house, recording the decisions made in committee and in chambers. As we (staff) watched the debate going on between these students, over issues such as the legalization of marijuana, abortion, the legalization of civil unions, and even a bill that would have stricken our most recent decision (as a state) to ban gay marriage, one of the other staff persons looked over and said during our discussion, "the world rewards sin". 

To be honest, that phrase hit me hard. It was something I had never thought out before, let alone heard straight from the mouth of a friend. To me, it was profound, in every sense. As I thought on that particular phrase, my mind wandered particularly to those bills that regarded civil union, HOMOSEXUALITY, something that the Bible gives speaks clearly and explicitly about, saying that it is unnatural for men to have relations with men and women with women. But, as our society "modernizes" itself with what everyone would call "civil rights", my heart continues to break at the belief that homosexuality is just "how some people are". My heart continues to break that our society believes that it is a woman's "right" to take the life of her unborn child should she wish to (I do believe, however, that the Lord can and will use these decisions to touch a person's heart, even amidst the consequences).  

As I read the news and see Vermont and Iowa legalizing marriage between same-sex couples, I become increasingly broken over this issue of how the world rewards sin. We are a broken people, so much so that even CHRISTIANS reward the sin in this world as we vote for "civil rights" which go against the very word of God, supporting sinful actions. How is the church ever able to stand up for what they believe in if we can't live out what we're called to support in casting a ballot. I have seen people brought out of homosexuality, out of the lust which I believe causes this unnatural occurrence. It is our turn to pray without ceasing, to PRAY, speak to God, interceding on all our behalves, that we may not yield to sin in our midst. My prayer is that God would speak to our lawmakers, to our President, to us, and that He would give us boldness to proclaim the Good News, and the strength to stand up for the law of the Lord, not the law of the world.

 To end,  the world rewards sin, and the majority of the time, the sad truth is that we do nothing to stop it. 

Grace->Faith->Works

The writer of Ephesians said in chapter 2 verses 8 and 9, "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not of your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast." Likewise, Paul writes to Timothy saying, 

"Therefore, do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, and which now has been manifested through the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, and for which I was appointed a preacher and apostle and teacher, which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me. Follow the pattern of the sound words that you have heard from me, in faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. By the Holy Spirit who dwells within us, guard the good deposit entrusted to you. " (2 Timothy 8-14) 

Paul was so moved by Timothy's sincere faith, which started in his grandmother, Lois, continued with his mother, Eunice, and now resides in him. He counts his joy as suffering and invites Timothy to share in the suffering which is our holy calling. It is not because of our works that we are saved, but it is how we know that we are saved through the good works that our faith produces. The book of James talks about what is it to be "doers of the Word" and not simply "hearers". In chapter 1, the author of James has this to say, 

"But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing." (James 1: 22-25)

When we accept Christ into our lives as Lord(1)  and Savior(2), we are called to be servants, obedient to the one we have committed our lives to, and as evidence of the change within, the rebirth into a family of God, we find ourselves doing things that we never would have before. This is because we have died to our sin and given ourselves over to new life in the light, where the Holy Spirit is given to guide us and convict us. The author of James goes on in Chapter 2 to saying, 

"But someone will say, 'You have faith and I have works.' Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe- and shudder! Do you want to be shown, you foolish person, that faith apart from works is useless? Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up his son Isaac on the altar? You see that faith was active along with his works and faith was completed by his works; and the Scripture was fulfilled that says, 'Abraham believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness' -and it was counted to him as righteousness'- and he was called a friend of God. You see that a person is justified by works and not faith alone. And in the same way was not also Rahab the prostitute justified by works when she received the messengers and sent them out by another way? For as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead." (James 2:18-26)

So to end, we are saved by faith, through grace, and was are justified and claim righteousness in the eyes of our Lord and Savior through works. 

1. Merriam-Webster's Definition of Lord: one having power and authority over others.

2. Merriam-Wesbter's Definition of Savior: one who brings salvation (or) one that saves from danger or destruction.

Here's to 2009

"My girl America's crying when she's lying in her bed at night

I can see that she's screaming when she's dreaming for her freedom

My girl America's dying while she's trying just to stop this fight

Don't stop believing my girl America...

I know she knows there's more because there is a voice she can't ignore

'Cause it was founded in the foundations, from the day of her creation,

In God We Trust engraved on the treasures of her nation

And the void that the boys can't fill

With the tipping of the bottle or the popping of the pill

But still most of her friends don't care as they glare

Ready to drown down the funnel as they frown down the tunnel

They stumble and they tumble breaking down into rubble

My girl American, stop can't you see

It's not the circumstances that determine who you're going to be,

  but how you deal with these problems and pains that come your way

It's for you that i pray with hope for a brighter day

And so I say, your deliverance is coming"

Mat Kearney "Girl America"

As an Atheist, I Truly Believe Africa Needs God...

"Missionaries, not aid money, are the solution to Africa's biggest problem- the crushing passivity of the people's mindset.

... [T]raveling in Malawi refreshed another belief, too: one I've been trying to banish all my life, but an observation I've been unable to avoid since my African childhood. It confounds my ideological beliefs, stubbornly refuses to fit my world view, and has embarrassed my growing belief that there is no God. 

Now a confirmed atheist, I've become convinced of the enormous contribution that Christian evangelism makes in Africa: sharply distinct from the work of secular NGO's, government projects, and international aid efforts. These alone will not do. Education and training alone will not do. In Africa, Christianity changes people's hearts. It brings a spiritual transformation. The rebirth is real. The change is good. 

I used to avoid this truth by applauding- as you can- the practical work of mission churches in Africa... But this doesn't fit the facts. Faith does more than support the missionary; it is also transferred to his flock. This is the effect that matters so immensely, and which I cannot help observing...

Those who want Africa to walk tall amid the 21st-century global competition must not kid themselves that providing the material means or even the knowhow that accompanies what we call development will make the change. A whole belief system must first be supplanted. 

And I'm afraid it has to be supplanted by another. Removing Christian evangelism from the African equation may leave the continent at the mercy of a malign fusion of Nike, the itch doctor, the mobile phone, and the machete." --Matthew Parris (prominent Atheist)

"Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat." 

-Mother Teresa

Romans 1:20 says, "For since the creation of the world, god's invisible qualities -- his eternal power and divine nature-- have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." 

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, the embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power." 

-Allen Cohen

"To dream anything that you want to dream. That's the beauty of the human mind. To do anything that you want to do. That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits. That is the courage to succeed." -Bernard Edmonds

James 2:17 says "So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead."

James 2:36 says, "Faith apart from works is dead" 

"Let us touch the dying, the poor, the lonely and the unwanted according to the graces we have received and let us not be ashamed or slow to do the humble work." 

-Mother Teresa

"Not only is another world possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

Colossians 3:12 says "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience."

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Take what you will from this compilation of quotes, but what I see if what I am called to; an uncomfortable life, a life serving my Lord and Savior. I am constantly amazed at the Lord for opening my eyes to the blessings He has set before me. He has blessed me with a job, albeit part-time, I have one, a job which pays my bills and rent. I am consistently blessed by the friends that have stood by me as I've transitioned to adult life (and I'm not completely sure I'm finished). I am constantly blown away by the humbleness I see in the people placed in my life and in my church. How could I ask for more than the shelter I have over my head, the friends I am blessed with, the church I am blessed with and the uncomfortability I am blessed with. 

I don't say this often, but Revival come to America and revival come to the world, that we may ALL know the blessings that the Lord has for us in our lives, and that we may live in fullness because the joy of the Lord is our strength.